Nature or Nurture?

Analyzing Infidelity III


My friend said women are so emotional...and he includes me in that category. They try to approach things using their heart and not through common sense. Taking that into consideration...

I started rationalizing the science behind Infidelity. That's were the internet comes in. I browsed through numerous articles and sites which tackles how genetics and environment play an important role in this seemingly broad topic. And these are just some of the excerpts that I found really interesting.

"Scientists suspect that many genes (50-100) could be associated with sexual behavior. They believe genes on chromosomes 3, 7 and 20 could be directly involved.". So it all starts in the womb ladies and gentlemen.Infidelity is in our genes.Nature has gifted us an engineered genetic imprint to be unfaithful.Researchers even say that women are mostly carriers of these genes. Men tendencies to become promiscuous would really depend on the size of a man's testicles ( Really now?! lol ) Just to prove that genetics plays an important role in adulterous behaviors some studies show that sleeping disorders (apnea) and/or erratic leg movements are some signs of man's thirst for lust even on a subconscious level.

"Once DNA testing becomes cheap then before entering into more committed relationships many men and women will surreptitiously take DNA samples from each other and have the DNA tested for genetic variations that contribute to infidelity and to other behavioral tendencies as well."

Here's a thought..What if you did find out that your partner has a tendencies to be unfaithful would that stop you from being with this person?! This is just another one of man's stupid idea of "fixing- it"...it's more stupid than the day they created the prenuptial agreement. Duh?! Some radical scientist would even suggest "gene therapy" or screening of babies for possible acts of infidelity in the future will help lessen the risk of marital disputes, legal battles, and eventually broken families.

Which brings us to the topic of "nurturing"..

"Radical feminists go so far as to argue that a so-called predisposition toward motherhood or heterosexuality is actually learned behavior. Thus they seek to deconstruct the institutions of society, such as the family and the free market, in order to reconstruct them to promote the "correct" set of learned behaviors."

Environment really plays an important role. Particularly the one that we are initially exposed to...our home...our family.This justifies what my friend Paul and I are discussing. Promiscuity outside the boundaries of a relationship is brought about by our need to be loved and be secured. These outcomes were experienced during when we are still sucking our mother's breast or when our daddy was carrying us on his shoulders. Thus the term 'nurture". When our partners can't meet our expectations... the image set on our minds...the feeling of being loved and secured we then tend to look for it somewhere else.

Regardless of what our predilections or predispositions may be, and regardless whether the sin is nature or nurture driven there should always be a need to justify if what were doing is right or wrong. "Being predisposed does not mean one is a helpless preprogrammed robot with no moral choice in the matter." We should know better than that.

Satisfaction?

Analyzing Infidelity II


In this doggy dog world of ours we are constantly faced with seemingly endless options in every various aspect of our lives. From the brand of toothpaste that we use to the contraceptive methods that are being want only because they advertised in all different mediums. print. screen. name it "SEX" is everywhere. Sex sells as they say. But that's another topic

Going back. The ratio of men as oppose to women has always been in favor of the "Alpha Male". Men have choices...women don't. Very seldom do you hear women accused of being polygamous in a relationship, it's always been the adult male. It's always the women who are always being associated with martyrdom and stupidity. Hear ye! Hear ye! =)

I remember there's even a mini series in HBO which tackles about polygamous relationships entitled "BIG LOVE". It's a story about a middle age man who is living with his 3 wives and children in one house. The daily plot is based on how he deals with each women and how the women deal with each other. Fighting and compromising for this man's love and attention. Geezer... what women do for love.

Being in a relationship women are always being baffled by that question.." Will I ever be enough for him? ". You tend to be paranoid with even the smallest things. Asking him questions such as " Who you were with? " or " Why is she here? ". Men think of it as insecurity...for women it's an art of survival. A way for us to keep our men. We go through great lengths just to please them. To satisfy not only their physical, emotional and wanton needs just so they could remain faithful to us and their marital obligations.

But will it hinder them from doing the inevitable? It won't . Stopping them will only fan their need to be unfaithful. It's the adventure of it all so to speak. And besides Men are egotistical in nature. For them. the merrier. the better. It often dictates their stature in society. Just to prove a case in point isn't it that every time you hear a guy having 3 girlfriends all in the same time, people would think that this guy is oozing with charisma and is really a great catch. But for women having the same kind of situation will never be treated as such and will only be castigated ,mocked and considered nothing but a whore and a teased. Talking about discrimination. Hey life sucks ladies...

But will you ever be enough? No one knows. No one can tell if you are the PERFECT person for him. Someone who could or would complete him. In the mean time we keep ourselves busy and our pockets drained with vanity that we don't need.

Regardless how many women he has or how scandalous his actions maybe, your only hope is that he still chooses you in the end. That is, if you are still there waiting for him. Ladies it's his lost... not yours!

What is the most important things in life

Yes, you read it right. ask anybody and they would tell you love is the most important of all. why people turn from evil to good, why they still exist, and any other things. But is really love the reason for everything? there are other things more important than staying in love.

TRUST. You can always trust the one you love but you can never make yourself love someone you don't trust. Ironically, the people who hurts us the most are the same people that we love the most. This is because we let them hold our hearts not knowing they would just drop it off to the ground.

PEACE OF MIND. Not having to worry about anything bad that is going to happen, at any given time, to you or the people you love.

CONTENTMENT. "You can never be too happy in this life", and that's true. It's somewhat the same as peace of mind. we are always in that state wherein we always want something more. It's natural, but if we could just be happy with who,what, where, and how we are, maybe it would make our lives a lot easier. Stay where you are but aim high. Give your best shot and be happy.

ACCEPTANCE. In acceptance we see our worth. you may not please everybody but it sure helps that they accept you the way you are. That you don't have to be like anybody to "belong". that you don't have to worry that you're always doing the wrong things. With acceptance you feel love, peace of mind, and contentment. these things would surely sum up to a feeling called BLISS. a sense of happiness that is immeasurable. a feeling that would make you feel all the love you need. And that surely is something that can be considered more important than love.